Sparkling Love
by sarah'sstorylines
Summary: The teenager Alec lives his life depressed and lonely. The complete opposite sparkling Magnus can't forget the shy boy till the moment he meets him. Will he find a way into the broken boy's heart? Self - harm, probably lemons in later chapters, all human!
1. Chapter 1

_New fiction - first chapter. Hope you like it, this time they're all human!_

_All characters belong to Cassandra Clare - thanks for them! :D_

_Cut._

I'm a bastard.

_Cut._

I'm not worth it.

_Cut._

He is right.

_Cut._

I'm nothing.

_Cut._

I'm useless.

Five fresh, bloody cuts are marking my forearm. They should probably hurt, but they don't, because I don't feel them. I feel nothing. I never feel anything, I just let the words go through me and pretend that they don't reach me. Because it doesn't matter, it really doesn't. But they do. They hurt me and I feel pain.

I put the razor blade down and stare at my face in the mirror. I look awful. My cheekbones are clearly there, my eyes way too big and my face shape too feminine for a guy. He is right. I AM ugly. I am disgusting and ugly. Why haven't I noticed when I was younger? This is strange. But however, I have to go on, or somebody will notice it. Or not. Probably not, nobody ever notices if I'm there. Except for Izzy, Jace and Max - they are the only ones who care about me. Or at least they say so. I'm not entirely sure, but it gives me the strength to move on. Because they need me. Or he will hurt them, too. Or maybe not - I mean, I am the son who is out of his mind, right?

Well I guess, I'll have to go downstairs. Izzy wants to go to a party and so does Jace.

Another night out without fun.

Another lonely evening.

How fun.

_So this is actually kinda depressing, but it's there to show you Alec's situation a bit. Next chapter will contain more plot and maybe some acquaintances ;)_


	2. Chapter 2

_So this is hopefully a bit more interesting! Short again, but it just fit there! Enjoy!_

_#Blake Shelton - God gave me you_

The party had been a total flop. Like always Alec was just counting the minutes till it would end, but he took the sacrifice for his siblings, even though it wasn't fun to him. At some point his brother and sister would come up to him totally drunk and want to go home. And he was so willing to do exactly that. Because he was busy. Since they were home he would cut. He always did. It was necessary for his sleep. At first, when the boy started, he just did it once a week - only when he felt really bad, but he actually got kinda addicted to the pain, which went with it. He needed it. He was suffering. He always was. But he got used to it. Alec didn't even notice the moments, he took out his blade and cut deep inside his wrists. The scars reminded him of his disgusting human being. He wasn't worth feeling happiness. At least he didn't think so.

—-

"WHAT?"

Izzy was screaming so loud, Alec was sure the neighbors could hear it.

"Izzy calm down" he said "It's just some school."

"No, it's not! All my friends are in Manhattan, I hate Brooklyn! I don't get the reason!" The young girl was shouting at their mother, nearly collapsing.

Maryse, their mother, responded quickly. "Yes you know exactly why, the school in Manhattan doesn't offer the same possibilities, and anyway, you're doing what I say alright? I will _not_ discuss this with you!"

"You guys _suck!"_

Isabelle slammed the door hard when leaving the room, leaving Alec and their mother alone.. Suddenly Maryse noticed Alec still standing there, motionless. They stared at each other and said nothing.

He broke the silence. "It's about me, isn't it?"

"Alec-"

"You're ashamed, aren't you?"

Maryse sighed. "Just - please don't make any problems, Alexander. You know what happened last year. You need to stay calm, okay? Please?"

Instantly Alec remembered the incident which had happened. He clearly saw the the guy lying on the ground — breathing heavily, bruises everywhere.

The boy shook his head, banning the memories from his mind. It wouldn't happen again - not again. He would keep his feelings under control and try not to be noticed. He had to. In fact it wasn't that hard, because he didn't stand out. He hadn't been noticed for six years at his school, until the day everybody started talking about the fag. That had been when his fist had met the guy's jaw.

This time he wouldn't talk to anybody. Just get through the last year of high school. Nobody would come close to him or even get to know him.

_Nobody._

_Oh, how wrong he was._

_Sooo, I actually think I'm kinda bad at this, but I just have such great ideas how this will go on, so - if you want - read the next chapters as well ;)_

_I will update soon :)_


	3. Chapter 3

_So guys, next chapter. THANKS a lot for your reviews, I really do appreciate that. _

_Btw, I realized, I wrote the first chapter from Alec's point of view and the rest different - but I'll just leave it this way, because I guess it was okay in the first one ;) And finally it's longer! Enjoy!_

_#Oasis - Wonderwall_

_#Korn - Word Up (It's a cover version, but I love it)_

"Come on Izzy, please get out of the car." Alec begged.

"No." His sister protested.

"Izzy, stop teasing me and get out - please?"

"I WON'T! I don't want to, Alec. It's so unfair." She whined, staring out of the window - anger written all over her face.

They were standing in the parking lot of their new school at Brooklyn - discussing.

"Oh my gosh - IZZY, I have no time for this shit, get out of the fucking car!"

"NO! What the HELL, ALEC!" Her brother had slammed the car door - locking it.

"Well then, see you later, sister." He was about to turn his back on her, when he heard her scream something.

"You wouldn't." Her jaw had dropped and she stared at her elder brother in disbelief.

"Yeah I will, or you get outta here, right now!"

Izzy sighed. "Alright. But if this school sucks I won't be here tomorrow."

"Yeah, I bet on that." Alec murmured.

"What?"

"Nothing."

They headed towards the huge door, passing some other students - this school seemed to be quite small! Alec couldn't see it as an advantage, he would have to take the risk of getting into trouble too easily with few people around. Glancing over the lockers, he noticed that most of the people who attended classes there were rather well dressed - rich people. They looked like they bought their things at Abercrombie and Louis Vuitton, which made him look down on his own clothing. Alec himself was, although he actually was sort of rich as well, not well dressed. In fact the boy looked like an outcast from the streets with his baggy, ripped pants and way too big worn out sweaters. Izzy used to tease him about his ‚style', but someday she realized that he wouldn't wear what she got him, so she finally gave up. Speaking of Izzy - her first hesitation was gone within seconds as she entered the hallway and saw some handsome guys. Not Alec's type, but still acceptable. She strutted through the hall, all gazes lingering on her. She on the opposite was dressed as if she would be going to a party every minute. Alec shook his head and said goodbye to his sister, telling her to meet him at his car later that day. He himself didn't want to get involved with _anybody_, so he just let his sister take her impressions and walked past her. Alec slowly made his way downwards the hall, trying desperately not to be seen. His head down and as quietly as possible he opened his locker, taking some informations out of it. Apparently he succeeded in blending, because nobody even turned their head. Most of the students were stuck in a conversation or had better things to do than watch the new, boring student.

_Except for a pair of gold green eyes, which followed him on his way, not leaving the boy for a second._

_—_

Alec's first lessons passed quickly, they were simply calculating some stuff and talking about the human brain. Originally Alec had been interested in such things, but after the incident in Manhattan, all of his thoughts were about how to drown the pain inside him with cutting and other self-harm.

Next lesson was English, which was about to turn out interesting.

When Alec entered the room at first, he didn't expect anything, except for the teacher and other snobs. His final attention got a guy, who was ten minutes late for class. He first noticed the man, when he heard his voice.

"Sorry Mr. Brown!" It was the most touching and soft voice, Alec had ever heard in his entire life. It made Alec immediately feel warm and safe inside - a feeling he hadn't felt ever in his life and which made him shiver.

The English teacher, Mr. Brown, answered - rolling his eyes.

"Mr. Bane - late as always. Why are you even coming, huh? Were you too concentrated on your make up? Anyway, let's start."

Alec tried to concentrate on the topic, but every time he managed to think about poetry his gaze would swift to this Magnus. If they say he was flamboyant, they were damn wrong. This guy was _crazy._ He wore purple leather pants, combined with a lime green shirt, which sparkled in the light. His hair was made into spikes and his eyes circled by black kohl. When he noticed Alec staring, he turned his head and winked at him with a smirk, causing Alec to blush. He _winked._ Nobody had ever winked at the boy. _Who was this guy?_ ‚Magnus Bane, dumbass, the teacher just introduced him' Alec thought. His blush deepened and Alec had to hide his face from the man, feeling Magnus' gaze still lingering on him. The rest of the lesson passed quickly and all of the students left the room - except for Alec and Magnus. Alec for his part, because he usually left after everybody and Magnus because he desperately wanted to talk to this new gorgeous boy. He decided to walk over and simply introduce himself.

"Hello, blue eyes. I'm Magnus, and you?" He smiled at Alec's confused expression, frowning when he saw the uncertain and destroyed look in this beautiful ocean eyes.

Alec stuttered.

"Uh, um, ye-yeah I'm sorry, I gotta go." Why did this guy talk to him? Why did he even want to speak with _him_? Why was this Magnus ruining his plans? Shocked and out of his mind Alec turned his back on the bewildered young man.

"Hey, I didn't mean to-" Magnus started, but Alec was already out of sight.

—

Alec stared at himself in the mirror - trembling. He had to get out of there, or he would have gotten rude. Well, he actually _had_ been extremely impolite, but this guy had turned his world upside down within seconds, which frightened him. Alec never really had been attracted to somebody and now Magnus Bane was touching his heart and soul in a way he didn't believe it could happen. The smooth sound of his voice and smile were too much for the boy. And he was _attractive_. He certainly was. Magnus had tanned skin - resembling asian people - and he was tall. Taller than Alec. That hardly ever happened. Alec was _literally_ _freaked_ out by the thought of anybody being interested in him. Because he was a mess. A wreck. Nobody should have to deal with him, because he was disgusting. He had scars all over his upper arms and chest - hundreds of them. Magnus even had noticed Alec's eyes - he wondered how closely this guy must have watched him, that he saw such ridiculous things about him. He didn't want to think about it - not anymore. He had to avoid Magnus, because he was ruining his principles and he couldn't bear another incident. He had to stay away from this person and forget those gold green eyes, which had burned themselves into the young man's mind. He wasn't able to finish his musing, when he heard the bathroom door open.

"Can I come in?" A soft voice asked, causing Alec to freeze.

_Why did he follow him?_

_Soooo, this was it, hope it was okay - and they finally met. I know it wasn't quite delightful ;) I will update soon!_


	4. Chapter 4

_Next chapter! Sorry for posting this SO, SO lately, but I'm really busy studying and playing Minecraft haha :D Hope you like it! :)_

_#James Blunt - Wisemen_

_#James Blunt - High (Oh and yeah I'm a little obsessed with James Blunt at the moment :D)_

"W-what do you want?" Alec's voice cracked at the last word as he tried to hide his tear stained face.

Magnus made a step towards the boy, but he didn't touch him - his fear of being turned down was actually quite big.

"Are you crying?" Concern in his voice.

Alec shook his head and quickly tried to wipe away his tears, though he still didn't look up.

"Why does it matter to you, huh?" He finally said.

"I'm worried." Magnus admitted. "You seem kinda lonely, actually."

Alec turned around in a swift and faced him angrily - with red eyes from crying.

"Oh, do I?" He snapped.

"Yeah you do." Magnus wouldn't back out so easily. This boy might be smart - but not _that _smart.

"Well, none of your business. Leave me alone."

Magnus shook his head in confusion as he responded.

"What the hell is the matter with you? You like being rude, huh?"

Alec simply glanced at him bugged out.

Magnus took a step back.

"Okay, I get it. Sorry for bothering you." He left the bathroom, leaving Alec alone. What was _really_ wrong with this guy?

—

"Why doesn't he like me, Chairman? Everybody likes me. _Everybody. _The most people would be pleased to talk to me - and he isn't. He _hates_ me! I'm still magnificent, right?" Magnus whined - his grey fluffy cat lying in his lap. _Meow._ "Cats - for no use." He shook his head sighing. He had noticed the boy the second he had come into the hallway. Black hair and blue eyes had caught his attention. That was the moment when he decided to get to know this boy. As long as it might take. As soon as he realized that both of them actually had the same english class, he immediately took the chance. He didn't think that he would be so rude - he had been watching Magnus after all. And Magnus had been watching him. He didn't even know his name - unfortunately.

Magnus yawned. It had been a tough day, which meant he really needed to get his beauty sleep. As he got up, he remembered to give Chairman his food. Stepping into his kitchen, Magnus filled his cat's bowl with cat food and started to undress his clothes. He was glad he was living on his own - in his own apartment. Because of specific reasons, Magnus didn't have anybody he could live with - and he was 18 after all.

Sighing he let himself fall onto his king size bed. He wouldn't talk to the blue eyed anymore. He had made his point clear - and Magnus was not a person who liked to make life more difficult. And he certainly was nobody who ran after someone.

_Dreams about a certain blue eyed boy haunted his sleep that night._

_—_

Alec was making dinner, when he heard somebody entering the house.

"Hey man, did you make dinner?" Jace shouted through the kitchen door.

A few seconds later he entered, but was cut off by his brother.

"JACE, where the HELL have you been this morning?"

"Oh yeah, sorry, I went to school with this new neighbor girl - Clary. The redhead? She goes to our school as well, she's really cool, dude."

"Alright, just tell me next time you don't need a ride, because I was actually waiting for you like for forever!"

"Sure, calm down. Oh by the way, have you met some hot girls yet?"

Alec blinked as he started to stutter. That was a very sensitive topic - and he didn't prefer to discuss it, especially not with Jace. "Wh-what? Uh - no, I haven't."

"Oh come on man, you have to take a look - there are some sweet ones!"

"Shut up, Jace." Izzy's voice came from the doorway. Looking at her brother apologizing she sat down at the table, grabbing some food. When they had finished Alec went up to his bedroom and instantly fell asleep. Dreaming about yellow green eyes, he smiled into his blanket - feeling warm once again.

—-

The next morning Magnus was on his way to school, but as he entered the parking lot he could make out two people. One was obviously the blue eyed wonder, but he was having a conversation with a woman - probably his mother - the resemblance was clearly noticeable. Slowly he sneaked up to them and hid behind a pillar. He surely wanted to know what was going on there. And then the woman started to speak once more.

"Alec, you can't go back there!" She sighed.

"Why not?" The boy was obviously holding his tears back.

"You know what happened, and that's why you have to stay calm, alright? Or do you want it to happen again?"

"What, huh? What do you mean. Just say it, mom."

"Come on, this is ridic-"

"What's ridiculous? That I'm gay? Or that you can't accept it."

WHAT? He was gay? Magnus smiled silently. This hot boy was apparently _gay._

"That's not fair! How could you say something like that!"

"Because it's true mom, I gotta go."

As Alec turned his back on his mother, Magnus heard her say something. Very quietly, but he was sure Alec could hear her.

"If you go now, I'll tell your father."

Alec turned around in a swift.

"You wouldn't!"

"Yeah I would - and I will. Have a nice day, son."

She got into the car and drove off, leaving Alec speechless and shocked in the lot. That was the point when Magnus decided to reveal himself.

"Alec?" He asked softly. Taken by surprise Alec turned around and faced him with anger.

"Were you LISTENING?"

"Uh, sorry, it was by coincidence" Magnus stuttered.

"Yeah, right. Just - shut up." Tears were building up in the blue eyes' face and he ran off. Not thinking any further about it, Magnus followed.

—

Alec just ran. He didn't know where he could go, when his feet took him to the student's bathroom and the next thing he noticed was himself sitting on the floor and cutting deep into his arms. Tears running down his face and pain mixed with anger made him feel like a mess. That was when he heard somebody entering the bathroom. A voice shook him out of his trance.

"HEY! WHAT THE HELL are you DOING?!"

Magnus ran towards the boy and threw the razor blade away. Alec jumped up in surprise and screamed. "It's none of your business, okay?! It's nobody's business, it's - it's.." Alec's voice cracked as he fell down to the floor - crying. When Magnus took him into his arms he wanted to protest, but he was too weak - and the feeling of somebody holding him made him feel loved and he became calmer.

After minutes of them just sitting there and embracing each other, Alec cleared his throat and wiped away his tears.

"Um, sorry, I really need to go."

But Magnus stopped the blue eyed from standing up as he tightened his grip. Alec stumbled and fell onto the tall boy's lap.

Their faces only inches away, Magnus turned Alec's face to his. Coming closer and closer - their lips were about to touch - as Alec closed his eyes…

_Oh my gosh - I know I really suck at it, but I hope it wasn't THAT bad. I know it took so much time, but I'm so busy - I really have no time, so please be patient!_

_Please review! :)_


	5. Chapter 5

_Next chapter guys! I know it's extremely late, but I can explain. I had no inspiration and I wasn't sure if anybody wants to read this story, but then I thought - well who cares? :) So it's not that long, but only because I wanted it like that. Hope you like it!_

_#Hurts - Somebody To Die For_

Alec stared into Magnus' yellow green eyes, soaking in the beauty. It was the first time Alec could see them closely and he was stunned. They were golden in the middle and had a green circle around the iris. Lost in thoughts he suddenly felt a hand caress his upper arm. That was the point when he realized what he was about to do. With wide open eyes and blushing he turned his head away. He tried to shift, wanting to get up but once again Magnus was quicker and pulled him back down.

"What's wrong?" He asked softly, caressing Alec's cheek.

Alec tried to catch his breath and nearly hyperventilated as he responded.

"What's WRONG? You come here chasing after me, _embracing_ me and then you try to seduce me and now you're asking what is _wrong_?!"

"Alec, come on, isn't this a little exaggerated? We barely know each other." Magnus pulled a little back - giving Alec some more space.

"Yeah, see? Exactly that's the point. We don't know each other and you have no right to - to.." He stuttered phrases, when he was interrupted.

"To - what? Stop you from cutting?" Anger was within his voice, as Magnus raised it a little.

Alec stopped, staring into Magnus' eyes, which glanced with disbelief. Alec's tears were about to come back - not what Magnus intended to make happen. With a scratchy voice Alec answered.

"Exactly."

Quickly standing up - still shaking on his whole body - Alec left. He simply ran out of the bathroom, ignoring Magnus who sat there in confusion - not really getting what just had happened. Glancing around, Magnus noticed that there were absolutely no blood stains anywhere - this boy really didn't want anybody to know. Except for the razor blade, which was still placed on the sink. Magnus decided to take it with him.

—

Alec just ran off to his car - unlocking it hastily. He still couldn't believe what had just happened. Had he been really going to _kiss_ Magnus? How could this have happened? Starting the engine, Alec drove off home, ignoring the unwanted butterflies in his stomach.

Later that night, Alec went to a party. Not because he wanted to - but because his siblings did. Isabelle had come up to him earlier and asked him to go with her.

—

_Earlier_

_"__Pleeease Alec, you need to go with me!"_

_"__No, Izzy. Not this time." Alec was becoming annoyed. Why couldn't they stay at home for once? He hated to have to look after his younger siblings, but normally he didn't mind that much. Except for today. Today he was overloaded with feelings like anger and something he couldn't really put his finger on. _

_"__But why? You always do!" Isabelle pleaded like a child for sweets. _

_"__ISABELLE! STOP!" Alec didn't mean to yell at her, but he couldn't stop it. It was simply too much. _

_Then her expression changed, as she noticed the pain in her brother's voice._

_"__Alec, what's up? What happ-" but she stopped when she saw Alec's shirt slip up, revealing bandages on his wrists. With quick steps she walked over to him, grabbing his arm._

_"__Alec - what did you do?" She looked at him with a stern expression, sorrow in her eyes._

_He pulled back. "Nothing I fell. Sports."_

_"__Alec you hate sports. What the hell were you doing?!"_

_"__I told you I fell! Leave it alone, alright? Let's go to this party!"_

_She furrowed her eyes, but decided to let him be._

_"__Okay let's go."_

The party was at a student's house, and everybody was invited. _Everybody. _Which included the whole school, so it was quite possible to meet Magnus there. And Alec wasn't in the mood of meeting anybody. Especially not Magnus. He clearly was somebody, who made him as comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time. So Alec didn't know how to feel about him. Alec turned off the engine looking at the big house. It was huge. Lights all over the windows and loud music booming out of it. Alec sighed - he hated his sister for this. But how would their conversation have ended if he didn't stop her? Still in thoughts, Alec didn't notice that his siblings were already gone and he was on his own. _Great, _he thought. Entering the massive mansion, Alec glanced around, his siblings nowhere to be seen. Jace was probably hanging on somebody's lips and his sister - well he didn't want to know what she was doing. He decided to ignore the guests and just disappear into a dark, lonely corner, grabbing a drink and waiting for the evening to end. Alec usually never drank, but since he was bored and tired, he broke his rules for once. He wanted to forget what had happened that day. He wanted to feel careless. He would get drunk and not be concerned about anything for once in his life. After five drinks and a little headache he felt somebody tap on his shoulder. Since Alec was a little tipsy, he took his time to turn around. Already in the mood to give a cocky comment. Turning around he found himself looking into gold green catlike eyes and his breathing stopped instantly. All his plans and thoughts were gone within a minute and he just stared.

_Soooo, how do you want me to go on? I have some ideas, but I really want to know what you guys want to make happen, so please tell me! Do you want them to talk, fight, something else? ;) Please review!_


	6. Chapter 6

_Hey guys, I know I'm not updating very often, but still I hope you keep on reading! Enjoy!_

_#Ed Sheeran - I See Fire (Only because the last part of the Hobbit has been released and I am soooo sad that it's over :(! )_

Before Alec could open his mouth, Magnus did.

"You forgot something." His voice was distant and cold as he handed the blade to Alec. He watched Alec twitch just a minute longer until he turned his back on him.

"Why did you keep it?" Alec's voice was nearly a whisper but Magnus understood him very clearly. He turned around just to see big blue eyes staring at him.

"What?" he asked.

"Why did you keep it? You could've just thrown it away."

"I guess you needed it, or not?" Magnus would stay calm and distant, he didn't want to be drawn into the boy's desolated life.

Alec blushed when he looked down to his feet. _Damn, he is so adorable_, Magnus thought.

"Come on, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way."

To Magnus' relief the boy lifted his head and surprisingly asked "You want to get a drink? I-I mean I don't drink normally, b-but I j-just thought-"

"Sure." Magnus broke Alec's waterfall of words, trying to make him a little more comfortable. They headed towards another corner, sitting down on a bench.

"So, how have you been?"

Magnus stared at him in disbelief.

"What? Are you serious? You pushed me away earlier, remember?"

Alec blushed again. After some moments he responded.

"I'm sorry. I-I mean I'm not like that. Not always. I was just really confused."

"Oooh" Magnus teased "where did this come from?" With a wink he grinned at him.

Alec looked at him with his eyes wide open. "Alcohol."

Magnus rolled his eyes. "Oh, so you can only talk normal to me, when you're _drunk_?"

"No! I mean, y-yeah I guess?"

"You are adorable you know that?" Magnus didn't even smile when he said it, he meant it truly honest.

"No, I'm not." That was when Magnus noticed, that Alec had been retracing the scars on his lower arm the whole time they had been talking.

"You wanna talk about it?" Magnus asked carefully.

Alec sighed. "No, actually. You don't want to, trust me."

"Maybe I do?"

Alec hesitated, would he really talk with Magnus about this? A guy he knew from school and had tried to kiss him? A guy who seemed so concerned although they didn't know each other that well? But before he could think about it any further the alcohol took control over his body and the words just came out of his mouth.

"M-my father is an asshole. He doesn't even know I'm gay" Alec's voice hitched at the word "he hates me, because I'm not the son he wants me to be. I don't bring home girls and I don't talk like he wants and I'm interested in books instead of soccer games and I have to look after my siblings and when I don't, he-he-h-" Alec's voice broke at the last part of his outburst. Magnus was sure he wanted to say something important, so he inquired.

"What? What does he do?" Magnus' sorrow was obvious, but every time Alec tried to catch his breath, his heart hurt.

"He, he - I can't tell you. I'm sorry. I gotta go."

Alec wanted to get up, but Magnus pulled him back down.

"It's okay, it's okay. But please don't just run away."

Slowly Alec sat back down, when tears found their way down his cheeks.

Magnus softly caressed the boy's face. "It's alright, it's alright. Come here." He pulled him to his chest and just held him. Alec didn't whimper, he just cried silent tears. After felt hours of them just sitting there and holding each other they pulled apart. Magnus broke the silence, trying to lighten the mood.

"You want something to drink?"

"Yeah sure."

"Alcohol?"

"Yep." A smile stealing onto Alec's face.

—

Alec opened his eyes, adjusting to his environment. It was dark and he was in a bed. His bed. But he was not alone. He could hear somebody breathe next to him and when he turned around he saw a colorful, sparkling man lying right beside him. _Magnus. _How the hell did HE get there?

_Wow, I'm sorry this is quite short. Actually I feel like I am not writing that well, please tell me if you still like it! :/_

_Review!_


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